


Welcome to your Doooom (aka Is that a TARDIS in your pants or are you just happy to see me?)

by Dream_wia_dream



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-20
Updated: 2011-04-20
Packaged: 2017-10-18 10:14:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/187819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dream_wia_dream/pseuds/Dream_wia_dream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fred & George open a Haunted Toy store.  Really.  That's about it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Welcome to your Doooom (aka Is that a TARDIS in your pants or are you just happy to see me?)

"Welcome to your Doooom. *cough* Step in and Welcome your Dooooom! Here is your...what the bloody...." Fred startled as a disembodied hand started creeping up the leg of his trousers. With a kick, he flung it across the room where it hit first the wall, then the floor with a double splat. The grotesque detached limb twitched once, then fell still. Fred loped across the room, scooping up the hand as he dashed out the door.

"George, did you sic this bloody thing on me again?" Fred accused, flinging the hand at his brother.

"Freddie, I'm so glad you could tear yourself away from that mirror," George chuckled as he ducked the flying appendage. "I know we're devastatingly handsome, but there's no need to continue with that narcissism when I'm here for you to stare at."

"Now who's full of themselves? Brother, dear...I will have you know that I was practising for the opening." Fred took a deep breath and began to intone the welcome he'd been trying out: "Welcome to your Doooom. Welcome to your..."

George ran across the room, grabbing Fred around the waist before he finished Welcoming an imaginary crowd to their Doom. Fred was silenced as George clamped a long, freckled hand across his lips to close his mouth.

"Hush," George whispered, pressing his own lips against the backs of his fingers. He let his fingers drop, then leaned forward to brush his lips along his brother's. "Hush," He whispered again with a small moan as he pressed his whole body closer to Fred's. Hands roamed across nearly identical bodies while the pair of red heads kept each other quiet, aside from a few quiet moans that slipped out between enthusiastic kisses. The pair of bodies slid to the floor until George lay on his back with his legs curled around Fred's hips. The ebb and flow of kissing and stroking finally settled as Fred rested his head on his brother's chest, while George carded his fingers through his twin's hair.

"Mmmm. Now that's a perfect good morning kiss," George said as his breathing settled. "But we'd better get going soon to make it to the opening on time."

Fred nuzzled closer to George for a moment, then planted his palms on the floor to push himself off his recumbent brother. Fred reached down and pulled George up off the floor with a tug that nearly sent them both tumbling back down.

"I'll give you two minutes to make yourself presentable, and we're off," Fred said.

George flipped his brother off as he walked back to their bedroom to put on his suit. "You might want to see about straightening yourself up a bit," he threw over his shoulder. "Wouldn't want the customers to see that tent you seem to have pitched in your trousers."

Fred glanced down at the inconvenient erection that the thrusting on the floor with his brother had produced. He smoothed out the fabric of his clothes, while walking back towards their room, trying to will his erection away. He stopped in the doorway, watching as clothes flew from all corners of the room to dress George. "'S completely your fault if there's any camping equipment in my trousers, brother. Besides, you're looking rather excited yourself, still."

"That's easily fixed," George smiled as he pointed his wand at his groin and his trouser front smoothed itself out.

"Nice trick there, bro," Fred laughed. "Care to let me in on your secret?"

"Ahhhh, nothing much. Just picked up a little sleight of hand from a bloke that stopped into the shop the other day. Something about Time and Relative Dimensions and all. Just a little trick that makes my pants bigger on the inside than the outside," George laughed as he incanted the same spell at his brother.

"Oh good," Fred smiled. "I thought you'd sent your pecker to another dimension or something. I'm glad it's still around. I've grown attached to the little guy."

"I'll show you little," George threatened with a laugh as he grabbed his brother around the waist and kissed him again, while Apparating them both into the foyer of their new shop.

Without breaking the kiss, George walked Fred backward until they were both leaning against something solid. They spent several minutes exploring each other until they were broken apart by a shower of water from above.

"Harry! I didn't have a hose to turn on the pair of them, so I had to set the new poltergeist on them," Ron explained to his irate husband. "I didn't know the thing would turn over half the shop trying to get to them."

"Never mind that, just help me put everything to right," Harry sighed, waving his wand to put the surrounding shelves back in order. Turning his attention to the twins, he called out "Oi, you pair are late. We've been trying to wrestle merchandise away from your new _employees_ for the past hour. I can understand you opening a toy store. I can even understand opening a _haunted_ toy store. But why in the bloody hell did you want to employ only ghosts and poltergeists? It just makes it harder to keep everything where it should be."

Harry finished putting the final toy back on the shelf just in time for the entire thing to be dumped over by another free-floating, trouble-making ghost. Throwing his hands up in frustration, Harry walked back over to the counter Ron was perched on, laughing at the antics of a pair of duelling pirate ghosts.

"Purely for the entertainment value, m'boy," Fred explained as he walked to the back counter.

"Besides, the whole beauty of this shop is that all the merchandise can be thrown around and left in disarray without hurting anyone," George said.

"But no one will be able to FIND anything," Harry huffed as he picked up yet another toy to place it back on the shelf.

Fred laughed, pulling a large book from under the counter, "That's why we have the catalog, Harry. Just touch your wand to whatever you'd like and the book gets it for you."

"Then what's the point of even having employees?"

"It just adds to the ambiance," George explained.

"Then why am I here so bloody early on a weekend if you don't need anyone to run the place?" Ron complained as he stretched out on the counter.

George knocked his brother's heavy boots off the counter top as he walked by. "Because you love us dearly, brother."

The four men wandered around the shop, adding the finishing touches in the moments before the doors were set to unlock. When the bell over the door rang, announcing the first customer's arrival, Fred jumped to the top of a shelf yelling "Welcome to your Doooom".

A frightened scream followed shortly and Fred came stalking back, covered in an orange ooze. "OK, so it's not a good idea to frighten small girls with joke wands. Got it. I'm going to go..." Fred gestured to the goo dripping off his head and walked to the back room, followed by Ron's hooting laughter.

The shop did brisk business for the next 10 hours. And by the time Fred and George were closing the shop's doors for the night, both men were completely exhausted. They quickly thanked all their ghostly employees for their work, and banished them all back to their respective haunting places for the night.

George yawned and stretched as he walked out of the back room once everyone had been cleared out. "I think the new shop is a great success. Even the people who just stopped by to see the Weasley brothers make fools of themselves bought a little something."

"I told you the new shop would be a good idea," Fred said around his own jaw-popping yawn. "Now to go home and sleep for eight hours before we turn around and do it all over again."  
George walked up behind his brother, wrapping his arms around his twin's chest to whisper in his ear, "Are you sure sleep is really what you want to do for the next eight hours? After all, we never got to finish what we started this morning. And I think this TARDIS spell has weakened the strength of the fabric of my trousers. I seem to have something rather large and bulky down there."

Fred moaned as George slowly rubbed his hips against his ass so he could feel the large and bulky area for himself. Fred turned in George's arms, and with a lusty kiss, Apparated them both back to their bedroom. "Oops, I seem to have splinched our clothes." Fred laughed, trying for innocent as he thrust his now naked body against his twin's.

"You've gotta stop..." George gasped.

"Stop doing this?" Fred asked, thrusting his groin against his brother. "You really want me to stop?"

"Stop making our clothes disappear, genius. I liked that suit."

"I'll buy you a dozen more," Fred said as he licked a line up his twin's throat. "Just needed you naked, right now"

The pair spun backward, landing on the bed, limbs tangled and hips thrusting. No coherent words were spoken. Only the sound of bitten-off moans and flesh sliding across flesh echoed across the room.

"Now, Georgie" was whispered, followed by a long moan as the brothers were joined. Hands caressing and leading each other toward the peak of ecstasy.

After a while the only sound left in the room was panting breath escaping cooling bodies. The brothers lay tangled up in each other once more.

"Love you, Freddie."

"Love you more, Georgie."

Soft kisses turned passionate once again and the brothers spent the night showing each other all the ways they had to love each other.


End file.
